In Germany almost all children and adults know Goethe’s poem „Once a boy a Rosebud spied,“. When reading the poem, we soon see that it is not prepared for translation. To avoid high translation costs and to get a reproducable result, we should prepare it for translation.
The original text is a true failure for all translation programs.
Once a boy a Rosebud spied,
We see a beginning like a fairy tale. „Once“ – this is very fuzzy, and it does not give you any true content.
We can easily omit it.
A boy spied a rosebud.
“Rosebud” is a poetic form. This certainly causes problems. Also „spied“ is suspicious, we use;
Saw a boy a little rose,
This is a form we can understand, but not good for translation.
We bring it to the standard.
A boy saw a little rose.
We want to accept this for now.
The next line is
Heathrose fair and tender,
This is impossible. It has basically the same content as the first line but includes feeling not usable for translation.
We use:
A boy saw a little rose.
This is accurate and saves you 50% of the cost for translation.
All array’d in youthful pride,–
This is quite fuzzy. Do you know whether the rose or the boy is array’d? Only Roses? Or the boy and the roses?
We adapt:
The rose was young and tender.
Tender? It is just beautiful. Add many ideas does not keep it simple.
The rose was beautiful.
This is better. It includes young and tender.
Quickly to the spot he hied,
This does not say much. You have to know where the spot is, and what do you mean with “hied?”
We use;
He ran to the rose.
The next part.
Ravished by her splendour.
It is: “he liked the rose”, isn’t it?
Rosebud, rosebud, rosebud red,
Heathrose fair and tender!
We already know what to do with this.
Red rose, red rose, red rose,
he liked the red rose.
Note that I reused the part that he liked the red rose. It is now only necessary to translate it one time.
After such a long way of sophistication we get;
A boy saw a little rose.
A boy saw a little rose.
He ran to the rose.
He liked the rose.
Red rose, red rose, red rose,
he liked the red rose.
Now we know what to do and I will give the other verses.
The boy said, “I’ll take you with me.
He liked the rose.
The rose said: “No!”
The rose said: “I’ll hurt you.
You will not forget me.
I will not come with you.
Red Rose, red rose, red rose,
the boy liked the red rose.
The boy took the rose.
He liked the Rose.
The rose hurt the boy.
The boy took the rose
home.
Red Rose, red rose, red rose,
the boy liked the red rose.
It is almost good – but too long. We have to shorten it to reduce the number of lines to reduce the translation costs further on. At the same time we make it more unique.
A boy saw a little red rose. The boy ran to the red rose, and the boy liked the red rose. The boy said, “I’ll take you with me.” He liked the rose. The red rose said: “No!” The red rose said: “I’ll hurt you. You will not forget me. I will not come with you. The boy liked the red rose. The boy took the rose. He liked the Rose. The rose hurt the boy. The boy took the rose home. The boy liked the red rose.
In German we get ,
Ein junger Mann sah ein wenig gestiegen. Ein junger Mann sah ein wenig gestiegen. Er lief zu der Rose. Er mochte die Rose. Rote rose, rote Rose, rote Rose, er mochte die rote Rose. Jetzt wissen wir, was zu tun ist und ich gebe den anderen Versen. Der Junge sagte, „Ich nehme sie mit mir. Er mochte die Rose. Die Rose sagte: „Nein!“ Die Rose sagte: „Ich werde Ihnen schaden. Vergessen Sie mich. Ich will nicht mit ihnen kommen. Rote Rose, rote Rose, rote Rose, der Junge hat mir gefallen die rote Rose. Der Junge hatte die Rose. Er mochte die Rose. Die Rose verletzt der junge. Der Junge hatte die rose home. Rote Rose, rote Rose, rote Rose, der Junge hat mir gefallen die rote Rose.
In Russian we get,
Мальчик видел немного вырос. Мальчик видел немного вырос. Он бежал в розовый. Он любит. Красный розовый, красный, красный розовый, он любит красного закрывается. Теперь мы знаем, что делать, и я другие стихи. Мальчик сказал, что „Я возьму вас с меня. Он любит. Роуз говорит: „Нет!“ – сказал: „Я буду вам больно. Вы не забыли меня. Я не с вами. Красный розовый, красный розовый, красный, мальчик любил красные розы. Мальчик занимает закрывается. Он любит. В наступающем году мальчика. Мальчик занимает закрывается дома. Красный розовый, красный розовый, красный, мальчик любил красные розы.
Back to English it is
The boy saw a slight increase. The boy saw a slight increase. He had fled to the pink. He loves. Red pink, red, red rose, he loves red rose. Now, we know what to do, and I have other poems. The boy said, „I’ll take you with me. He loves. Rose said: „No!“ – said: „I will hurt you. You have not forgotten me. I am not with you. Red pink, red pink, red, the boy loved red roses. The boy took a rose. He loves. In the coming year-old boy. The boy took a close at home. Red pink, red pink, red, the boy loved red roses.
——-
Note:
The original I used was in English
Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heidenr%C3%B6slein
Once a boy a Rosebud spied,
Heathrose fair and tender,
All array’d in youthful pride,–
Quickly to the spot he hied,
Ravished by her splendour.
Rosebud, rosebud, rosebud red,
Heathrose fair and tender!
Said the boy, „I’ll now pick thee,
Heathrose fair and tender!“
Said the rosebud, „I’ll prick thee,
So that thou’lt remember me,
Ne’er will I surrender!“
Rosebud, rosebud, rosebud red,
Heathrose fair and tender!
Now the cruel boy must pick
Heathrose fair and tender;
Rosebud did her best to prick,–
Vain ‚twas ‚gainst her fate to kick–
She must needs surrender.
Rosebud, rosebud, rosebud red,
Heathrose fair and tender!
Neues vom Hutschi 